Sunday, February 28, 2010

Easy To Be Hard

Wow. Just dipped below 100 days on the countdown timer. Like the longer days and the crazy crop of drowning worms on the pavement Friday, it's a sure sign that RAAM is getting closer. This definitely feels like a milestone to me, so I'm taking a moment to reflect. How ready am I, really? What needs to happen?

I'm feeling strong and ready - but I know I can't lose sight of how much more I want to accomplish between now and June. I feel the same, but changed. I've been marked for life, and I'm also sure that I'll be marked again and again.

More than anything, I've made a conscious decision to drop the defenses and the tough-girl act, and let RAAM in all the way. Time was, anyone who offered to help me got the 500-mile stare and a good ration of  "I've got it, thank you very much" attitude. That's out the window. I figure that anyone who's not figured out that I'm tough by now is a hopeless case - I don't have much to prove on that score.

Not having to be so danged tough has left the door open for me to be a little kinder, less sarcastic, more receptive - not a bad thing at all. Not that I'm jumping on any new bandwagons, switching my diet, ditching my training program, but - I'm listening, learning, refining. Much more than tough, I'm resilient. Bend, don't break, and return to a stronger core every time.

I've been listening to a lot of music, filling my ipod with the music that I think will help me get across America faster. While I'm poking around looking for what I think I'm searching for, I seem to stumble upon (can I still say that without violating some trademark?)  exactly what I need. I went to Three Dog Night looking for some of their more upbeat classics - Joy to the World, Shambala...and here's what got stuck in my head:

What a timely reminder ! It's easy to be closed, and so danged hard to be open, even (especially?) around the people who matter the most. A successful RAAM will require the latter of me. I'm a work in progress, for sure - but I'm getting better, and I know it.

Seems strange to not have much to report. I'm riding outside when I can, and training indoors when I must. A strong weekend - a depletion workout indoors on Saturday and a very pleasant sunny spin outdoors today. Legs feel strong after Sebring and for the first time in quite some time I'd have to say that they LOOK strong, too. I guess pushing a giant gear into the wind for a very long time had some sort of positive effect.

My next race is the Davis 24 - and although it's earlier than it has been in years past, there's still a reasonable chance that it will be hot. I've been adding a heat training component to the indoor workouts, and I'll post more about that sometime soon.

No comments:

Post a Comment